Block Burger,
The Epicenter,
East Point Business Park, Alfie Byrne Rd,
North Dock, Clontarf.

DISCLAIMER – We were contacted and invited in by Block Burger. We did not pay for this food and received everything for free. This has NOT swayed or influenced our review in anyway. There was no payment for this review.

I’m baaaaaaaaaaaaaack! Not that anyone probably noticed I was gone – my resting bitch face always gets caught in the selfies and ain’t no-one gonna miss that!

But anyway – yes, I am back. After four weeks. I was medically certified, certs have been produced to the rest of the group and they haven’t chucked me out yet. To be fair, it was actually Ryan’s week to review, but he went to take a funny picture of his cat, put his back out and now has a mushy brain from all the Valium he has to take, so I stepped up to the plate. This is the exact moment Ryan became “Old Man Simpson”.

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But you didn’t come here to read about my resting bitch face or Ryan being an old man. You came here to read about burgers – and read about burgers you shall.

Everytime we ask for suggestions about where to eat (and I mean EVERYTIME) – Block burger gets suggested. To be honest, collectively as a group, we’ve become a bit sick of hearing about it. It seems to be a case of “once bitten, forever smitten” (I stole that line from Ryan). It’s almost as obsessive as Twi-hards, or myself and Suzy’s undeniable love for One Direction & Busted. So, when we were invited in, it seemed only right to bite the bullet.

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The first point I want to make, and it was an almost unanimous agreement (except for Rory) – it was very hard to find. If you know where the Epicentre is in East Point, then you’re sorted. But, if unlike us, you’re not sure – you may get lost. We all made it to East Point fine, but actually finding the Epicentre proved difficult. Essentially, it’s miles away from anything in the middle of a completely empty industrial estate with no signposts. I had a sat nav and still ended up turning random corners until I found it (and still drove past it twice). Ryan ended up following the dick (see below).

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BUT… we made it! We were greeted by Wayne when we walked in. Personally, I liked the place – it had an indoors and a sheltered outdoors section. I thought it was funky (I notice interiors way more than I care to admit) and the menus are on the table as soon as you get there. The lighting wasn’t the greatest (essential for those group selfies!) but this didn’t bother me. Suzy however, isn’t a fan of dark places – it means she can’t watch me try to shovel a burger into my mouth in all my glory – so that was definitely a ball-buster for her.  Absolute kudos for this sign Kirsty found in the bathroom 🙂

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When I first caught a glimpse at the menu I thought to myself “that is TINY” but when you actually look at it – it has so much to offer. As they say, it’s not the size of the boat, it’s the motion in the ocean. I’ll let you decide for yourself, have a little glimpse.

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And, shock horror folks, I didn’t go for the bacon cheese burger. I decided to expand my horizons, open my palette to the finer things in life and I’m a sucker for Jack Daniels sauce – the Whiskey Stack was a no-brainer. And because I’m a plain Jane when it comes to side – I went for bog standard chips.

So, for those who don’t know, Block Burger are not only eat-in, they also do take-out and deliver within a one-mile radius. We were given the opportunity to see exactly how the burgers are delivered and honestly, I’ve never seen anything like it. Not only am I a lover of interiors, but I’m a big believer in attention to detail and this was honestly the first time I’d ever seen something like this. A welcome change from answering the door and someone handing you a brown bag with a receipt taped on!

And now, the big one, the burgers (sure that’s why we’re here). Well, take a look for yourself.

First things first, the burgers are HUGE. I tried to squish it down, I tried to punch it, damn I even contemplated sitting on it to make it that little bit easier to put in my mouth (seriously why is my review full of so many innuendos). Eventually, I managed to do it, by taking the onion rings off. To be 100% honest, I wasn’t a big fan of the onion rings – however, I am putting it down to personal preference. I like smushy onion rings (you know, the fake ones you buy in Iceland). The texture of an actual onion ring freaks me out. Ryan LOVED the onion rings, and in fairness I actually took the coating off mine and put it back on the burger.

Myself & Ryan had the same thing, and in fairness, apart from the onion rings, our conclusions were exactly the same. The parts of the burger were amazing – especially the fresh salsa. However, we did find that all of the flavours offered on it completely hid the taste of the actual meat patty itself. We did sample the burger by itself, and trust me, it was definitely something to write home about – but as a whole, the other flavours overwhelmed it. Now, in saying that, we polished it off, because as above, it was amazing.

As a whole, we all really enjoyed the burgers. Personally, it was probably one of my favourites. Rory said that his worked perfectly – not encountering the same issue as me and Ryan. And Suzy loved hers.

Kirsty enjoyed her burger, but she was raving about the sides even more. She had the sweetcorn, fries and beans. The beans were something that I’ve never seen before – maybe I’ve just lived a sheltered life, but there was BIG CHUNKS OF MEAT IN THE BEANS. This is NOT a drill. MEAT IN THE BEANS. And it worked! The general consensus about the fries were the same – lovely. All was going well, then came the chipotle coleslaw. Oh the chipotle coleslaw.  Slight disclaimer here – I don’t like coleslaw or chipotle. Lads, I don’t even know how to pronounce chipotle. I sat this one out. Ryan took the first bite and made a weird face. Suzy decided to try some, made a weirder face than Ryan and back on the tray it went, never to be touched again. Maybe it’s an acquired taste, but our advice is to give it a miss and maybe go for the onion rings instead.

Then came the dessert. An impromptu dessert but a dessert none the less. Cupcakes! Now, to tell the truth, I’m not a fan of cupcakes. The texture of them freaks me out and I always find that they’re too dry. But when these bad boys came out I took the “when in Rome” approach. Oreo, Vanilla and Red Velvet. I went for the Red Velvet, because I know nothing about baking or pastry and it sounded fancy. It was amazing. A taste revelation. I was slightly disappointed in myself after eating it. I felt as though the last 25 years of my life had been less meaningful because of the lack of cupcakes. Everyone else was impressed with theirs, except for Ryan. Maybe vanilla just isn’t his thing.

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All in all, I’d recommend Block Burger. I can see why everyone is such a big fan. It’s something different. We went on a Saturday, which meant the place was really quiet – head over on a Friday and you’re running into the masses of people who finish up work for the weekend and want pints. I enjoyed the atmosphere, the service we received was second to none and the food was amazing.

Value wise – I had no complaints. The burgers were reasonably priced, the sides come in at €2.95 per side. The cupcakes are €3.95 each. As I said above, we were kindly invited in for a free meal, but I think I speak for everyone when I say that judging by the prices offered on the menu, we were surprised with the standard of food. I’ve paid similar for food that I wouldn’t give to a dog; and I’ve paid more money for food that is on par with Block Burger. Make no mistake, if you’re looking to line the stomach before a night on the sauce, look no further than Block Burger.

Generally when I write these reviews I judge by whether or not I’d go back. Would I go back to Block Burger? Absolutely. With me, it was definitely a case of “once bitten, forever smitten” – so I’m firmly on the band wagon and I’m here to stay!

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Burgers – 9

Sides – 8

Service – 10

Total – 9