Na na na na na na na na MANDERS!!!
I’m back after a crazy couple of months and being more or less off the radar in every aspect of my life that didn’t involve work or selling & buying a gaff (seriously – don’t bother your arse with it). Anyway, back I ran to my friends in Dublin Burger Club – right fair enough, about a month ago but I’ve only been brave enough to start writing again. Anyways, this isn’t the Samaritans hotline, so instead of listening to all of my (first world) problems, please enjoy some majestic photos of Ryan in his glory years.
Not forgetting my personal favourite….
I never thought I’d say it…. but the years have been kind to our Ryan!
This week, we went on an adventure! Well, not so much an adventure – but we did go to Tallaght, which is far enough out for a countryman, a Scotsman and a northsider. Reviews for this place are always scored highly – so we decided to take it on, and see if it lived up to the hype.
Aussie Outback is a small little place, just across from the Square (two hours free parking FTW) – facing out onto the road. Hidden if you don’t know where you’re going (don’t take my word for that. Worse sense of direction known to man.)
We can never leave the menus as a surprise, we always look beforehand so we knew what to expect. But this week came a strange change – a change I’ve never seen before, and I’m not sure how I felt about it. Lads, Rory didn’t go for the biggest burger on the menu. Now, we’ve had him assessed, he’s seen a doctor – he’s okay, apart from the obvious, but something was definitely wrong.
Rory went for a standard burger from the menu – even though “the Beast” was in our faces the whole time. I was surprised – appalled actually. But to be fair, he still went for a burger that was bigger than his damn head – the Baby Beast of the Outback and it looked good. Sickeningly full of meat, but good. Myself & Ryan being the normal people we are opted for something more, well, not likely to give you a heart attack with Ryan opting for the Bushwacker (it’s okay – I laughed too) and me choosing the Outbacker with those sweet sweet potato fries.
The general consensus was the same. Let me tell you, we’ve been doing this closing on a year at this stage, and I always find that big burgers don’t always work. There has to be a certain meat to toppings to bun ratio (I shit you not) for it to do well. I had my doubts. I imagined toppings falling out the sides, the bun crumbling to a mess, and the thing I hate the most about messy burgers – the patty sliding out of the bun. I don’t often say this, but I was wrong.
I was pleasantly surprised when the burgers arrived. They looked good – everything was where it should be, there was no slippin’ or slidin’, there were sticks perfectly placed in the centre of the burger to hold the show together. I picked it up, and it all stayed put. I took a bite, and it all stayed put. In fact, it didn’t really crumble until the end, and in fairness, that probably had more to do with Ryan telling me stories of his youth which left me with tears rolling down my face. Nothing I will mention here – not because I don’t want to embarrass him, but because I need it for leverage for the next time he promises people I’ll send nudes if they follow us on Twitter!
Looks good eh?
We all had various amounts of meat between us (ha!) – but we all thought the same – generally, you’d expect 1lb of meat to be burned to a crisp, so the restaurant knows the middle is cooked. But not this time. It was well done, but not so well done that it was dry and hard to chew. It was juicy, and the topping to patty ratio was perfect. Nothing was too overpowering, no tastes cancelled eachother out but rather they all complemented each other perfectly. Both lads went for a burger with pulled pork on them, and in Ryan’s words it was “fucking awesome” – pulled pork is hard to get right. I won’t mention any names but just read the EatYard review and you’ll know why I’m so against it. We were all super impressed with how well the burger held itself together – no mess, no fuss. All in all, the burgers lived up to the expectation, and then some.
Now it’s time for sides – that’s where things kinda dipped a bit. I got the sweet potato fries – I didn’t finish them. I should really have learned my lesson by now – I always end up disappointed with sweet potato fries when I eat out. Next time I’m gonna ask if I can bring my own. Don’t get me wrong they weren’t the worse I’ve ever eaten, but I’ve definitely had better. Ryan went for plain aul fries – he wasn’t mad on them, he said the flavouring on them was a bit weird. From a man who comes from a nation that eats Haggis. There wasn’t much point in asking Rory what he thought of the sweet potato fries seeing as the wee bucket was empty as soon as I looked back around at him.
We decided to have dessert (wouldn’t be like us!) – with the lads going for Death by Chocolate and me opting for the sticky toffee pudding. This is where the opinions really differed. Ryan managed to convince himself (and all of us) that his just came from a tin and they banged it in the microwave – I don’t even think he ate half. Rory said it was “alright”. But me? That sticky toffee pudding was the best thing that had happened to me all day… now I live a simple life, but not that simple. It was unbelievable – the warm pudding with the ice cream, I was living the god damn dream!!
Unfortunately I didn’t manage a picture of the desserts, so here’s another picture of Ryan looking like a foot.
So, would we recommend? As Ryan said – we often rate the place on a willingness to go back whilst not on Burger Club duties. Ryan told me at 10.20 in the morning that he’d drive over for a burger, Rory text me at 9.10 pm to say he was considering asking if they’d deliver to him, and I just googled what time they were open until, I’m going to say it’s a resounding YES. A place that has been recommended to us a few times, and it didn’t disappoint. Yeah so the fries could use a little work, the desserts will divide even the strongest of friendships but if those burgers are wrong, then I don’t wanna be right.
TL;DR – Rory got a burger the same size as his head and finished it. Place is worth a visit.
Burgers – 8
Sides – 6
Desserts – 7
Service – 9
Total – 7.5 (would definitely bang)